When you go Nando’s and they ask you if everything is ok with your meal while you’re eating pic.twitter.com/kbNi9Ddcz5
— Mo Gilligan (@MoTheComedian) January 12, 2018
Imagine if women had to orgasm to get pregnant by men. there’d be like 8 people in the world.
— erin (@erinmisakaa) January 9, 2018
it’s time us men started humbling these women pic.twitter.com/MvoNhXQUe7
— kami (@lowkeyscum) January 11, 2018
5 months later when she start putting one of your lies together. pic.twitter.com/NwGEisNgx6
— january 29th ☾ (@speediskey__) January 12, 2018
Girls want a low key popular humble nigga that's cocky who nobody know but everybody want that's assertive and sensitive who carry guns but plan picnics and walks in the park
— Nasty Na (@WolfOnWallSt215) January 11, 2018
When someone says hey, but you can’t quite remember their name pic.twitter.com/ZphATz6Rb8
— 🎹 (@Dr_Sweets23) January 12, 2018
Arsenal Fan TV in the year 2025 pic.twitter.com/reuE4Saahg
— Dan Soff (@Dan_Soff) January 14, 2018
Fuck this app pic.twitter.com/kJJWaf8oV0
— Biniam Bizuneh (@biniambiz) January 13, 2018
Bloke in the gym the other day comes to me, he said GAZZA I've lost 8 pounds,so I lent him a tenner x
— Paul Gascoigne (@Paul_Gascoigne8) January 14, 2018
Wilshere dribbles away from eight players, passes to Iwobi and Iwobi runs back to the eight players lmaoooo
— Paddy (@VieiraPaddy) January 14, 2018
It's sad most of Arsene Wenger's ex players aren't in his corner
One of the only one's that seem to be is George Weah & that's probably because he's the president of Liberia now & he wants to learn from Wenger how to stay in charge for so long so he can become the next Mugabe
— Dan Soff (@Dan_Soff) January 10, 2018
When ur high at a restaurant and the waiter comes over and asks "how is everything over here?" pic.twitter.com/ckepTT3a7b
— cubanita (@iambrittanym_) January 9, 2018
Lacazette is Leroy lita with a beard
— Jack.Gambino (@obeng_ATO) January 10, 2018
Ludacris: “ I wanna li li li lick you from yo head to yo toes…”
8 yr old me : pic.twitter.com/1XpweFPeT3
— [raven] (@GA_peach13) January 10, 2018
Got my dad Dior Sauvage & Gucci Oud for his birthday. Gucci Oud gives my step mum headaches so I couldn’t wait to buy it. Best money I’ve spent this year
— Keith Dube (@MrExposed) January 10, 2018
— Nigerian Prince (@TadelayoS) January 7, 2018
Just sold 2 Kitkat’s to my neighbour’s son for £1.50 each. Don’t know how y’all do this 9-5 stuff.
— Still my bday tbh (@daryl_ei) January 9, 2018
"ILL SLAP EVERY MAN IN THIS ROOM FAM"
Me: slap who? pic.twitter.com/xGVr7pVZEH
— Frostino ❄️ (@Only1ShoKole) January 10, 2018
Your man is sleeping with my girl. Sorry to break this to you on here, Damilola. — I know. I slept with her too https://t.co/AUYFRwYugT
— Oloni (@Oloni) January 10, 2018
When 30 sec in that thang and you know u aint gon last.. pic.twitter.com/iqcdZNYJZ8
— Rasheed Nicholas (@SouthBeachSheed) January 9, 2018
Boycotting H&M isn't the answer. The answer is stealing their clothes.
— Tukach Shakur 🇳🇬 (@its_kachi) January 8, 2018
I remember walking home from a rave at uni because I went with £20 to my name. I was on the dual carriageway thinking if I die I die
— KHAL. (@Unkle_K) January 10, 2018
I don't think Nigeria should elect any president in 2019, we need to be single for a few years and find ourselves.
— Onyekachi (@its_roi) January 9, 2018
— Lemar (@Lemar) January 9, 2018
Mandem after the rave waiting outside their whips trying to draw tings after the club they didn't even go to pic.twitter.com/ajEImEAAHv
— Lewishyouwereme (@lewishyouwereme) January 9, 2018
Y’all ever start a prayer for your family, then it escalates to praying for your friends, and next thing you know you asking God to keep the whole world safe?
— Ro (@BadGalRoro) January 9, 2018
The way Davido is shouting on FIA is how Wizkid should've shouted his part on One Dance but instead he whispered like it was a government secret.
— Tyrant (@ProfKumi) January 10, 2018
Nudes are so 2017. Send me money.
— Evan (@EvansPosts) January 10, 2018
Riding on top for longer than 2 secs https://t.co/TTL4np5cU1
— Awon Frenemies 🇰🇪🇳🇬 (@PHREN0L0GY) January 7, 2018
My charger can be next to me and I’ll still let my phone die https://t.co/jEsY57QtGb
— NBA AB (@adzbanks1) January 7, 2018
Tryna hide your boner while spooning your female bestie <<<<<<<<<
— KHAL. (@Unkle_K) January 8, 2018
Condoms dont really guarantee full protection during sex. A friend of mine was wearing one and he got shot by the girls boyfriend.
— Baptized in Lean (@Juice2Wavy) January 8, 2018
he's 5 years old and said a curse word one day in response to not getting his way. i got eye level with him and told him we don't use words like that in our house. this child looked me dead in my eyes and said "this is an apartment, not a house"
— Rebecca (@rebeccaisdope) January 8, 2018
So basically I asked Prince Harry… does he know about Giggs … he said what events…
Fair enough 😂🤷🏿♂️
— Jeremiah Asiamah (@JeremiahAsiamah) January 9, 2018
do regular dogs see police dogs and think oh shit its the police
— alexander (@whosalexander) January 6, 2018
He’s entitled to his own opinion. However, I think. Lupe make music for niggas that write long answers on the test and still get them wrong. https://t.co/3PzqIk5QTC
— Kylan Dr. Durag Morris (@AwwHELLToTheNaw) January 9, 2018